Bear Lawyer Conducts Opposition Research

Let’s see… small, flightless, slow-moving on land, clumsy on ice, no opposable thumbs… huh. Absent any external upgrades—like, say, a pair of mechanized trousers or a demonic wishing eye or some such techno-magical mumbo-jumbo—exactly how are penguins supposed to be a threat to bear-kind, let alone an impediment to the return of Lord Stanley’s Cup to the Cradle of Liberty?


6 responses to “#360

  1. Oh, you’ve no idea the depths those tuxedoed terrors will sink to in order to win. For example, they’ve an evil plan to sap the Bruins of enthusiastic fan support by removing all access to Sam Adams! http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nhl-puck-daddy/pittsburgh-bar-bans-sam-adams-sales-during-bruins-124432563.html

  2. And yet somehow, Morgan Freeman narrates for them.

    In fact you are now reading this in his voice.

    • These zoo enclosures are funny. First you hate ’em, then you get used to ’em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That’s institutionalized—they send you here for life, and that’s exactly what they take. The part that counts, anyway.

  3. He’s not wearing a red rubber glove on his head, so he’s not a threat. 😉 #WGftw

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