Hydration is the number one cause of low RBI. Low blood sugar is a close second. Lack of adequate rest in a distant third. Bear Lawyer is nothing if not a team player.
Which is precisely why Bear Lawyer makes certain to have a nice cold keg (or several) on tap in the dugout—fluids and carbs in one go!—though he is hardly opposed to a hearty nosh in-between pitches. Plus, the dog- and lager-induced bloating of BL’s paunch helps tighten up his otherwise unmanageably large strike zone. If the opposing pitcher wants a strikeout, he’d best be prepared to earn it.
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