Just make sure that’s a claws retracted pat! Those butterfly band-aids can be pricey, and dental floss . . . not to mention the billable hours lost by having to relegate paralegals to doing the careful stitching.
All new recruits, be they interns, paralegals, first-year associates, or poached veteran attorneys, are supplied with a copy of the U.S. Army’s survival guide (FM 21-76) on their first day, and are expected to be able to forage for food and fashion their own shelters, weapons, camouflage, herbal remedies, poultices, bandages, tourniquets, crutches, litters, braces, and traction splints using only materials readily available in the forest. Orientation is explicitly designed to test equal parts legal acuity and wilderness survival skills, with the latter being especially important during the circuitous trek to and from the office-glen.
As any intern could tell you—rather, would tell if, were it not for NDAs, comas, and/or broken jaws—those mid-morning coffee runs are no walk in the park.
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