Bear Lawyer Hopes This is Covered by His Homeowner's Insurance

Slick on the cavetop—a reindeer falls!
Out jumps anxious Santa Claus,
Straight from his sled with a righteous yell
To find the den-owner and give him hell.

Uh-oh oh! Wouldn’t you know!
Uh-oh oh! Wouldn’t you kno-ow!
Armed with a ballpoint—click click click
Fast with the lawsuit is good Saint Nick.



6 responses to “#220

  1. Bear Lawyer’s landing strip is narrow, but well deliniated between the two quaking aspens. It’s a clear case of driver negligence. Especially as the Merry Olde Soul isn’t wearing his bifocals. I’d hate to think St Nick had tried to take out the head of the reindeer union on purpose, but . . . .

    • Staging an accident to to take down Dasher? Claus may be a wily old codger with a taste for toy-making, cookies, and autocracy, but that doesn’t mean that he would endeavour to dispose of an antlered labour officer (and occasional critic) in such a callous way, let alone disrupt his delivery schedule to do it.

      That, and it must be noted that Bear Lawyer hadn’t exactly anticipated a visit from St. Nicholas this year, what with all the enhanced elfen scrutiny and less-than-cordial dealings with the North Pole over the past month, so said landing strip may or may not have been cleared and/or fully illuminated.

  2. hahaha thanks for the little song addition. Nice touch.

  3. As usual, fantastic. I hope Bear Lawyer had an excellent holiday season! (So did you make deer jerky from the reindeer or what?)

    • Perish the thought! While Bear Lawyer does enjoy a good haunch of venison, he is not so unthinkingly carnivorous as to take advantage of a wounded reindeer, especially not while there are witnesses.

      Rather, after the rest of Claus’s team came about with the un-stuck sleigh, BL gave the downed Dasher a fortifying draught of the ‘Hooch (yet small enough to keep the reindeer’s BAC well below the legal limit to drive a sleigh) before sending an irate Santa and his abashed team on their not-so-jolly way—after taking photos and exchanging insurance information, of course.

  4. I wouldn’t expect any lower level of thoroughness from M’sieu Bear. The “‘Hooch” was a nice thought.

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